“We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever.” – Carl Sagan

I just came across this quote and it really sparked up something inside of me,

“We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever.” – Carl Sagan

My interpretation of this quote resonates with something I have witnessed happen with my feelings and emotions all of the time. I interpret this quote as saying that when we have those moments of great happiness, immense feelings of love and joy; we feel so elated and on top the world and in result feel indestructible. We assume those positive feelings and highs will never end once we have attained it. However, they do.

The fact that we come down from that place of bliss is natural. However I have now come to understand that that feeling of bliss, is temporary pleasure. It is a feeling mistaken for what we’re really meant to attain which is inner peace,

“Pain is inevitable, Suffering is optional” – Buddhist Proverb

It’s very easy to get into a trap of justifying and putting a label on where you are in life. This could be due to maybe feeling stagnant and without realising, looking outside of yourself to find a reason to feel happy, successful and loved. Another thing that gets brought into this mixture is beating yourself up about feeling bad. You know how to be happy and positive yet here you are feeling low. It’s as if you’ve let yourself down as you are not appreciating everything you have or you’ve somehow not used your abilities to their best potential. Those thoughts only make the situation worse, they are not beneficial and are useless. We have the power to change things and the first step is to focus solely on what you wish to see, feel and accomplish rather than looking back or at your current situation and not feeling good about it.

Online, individuals have suggested that the meaning of the Carl Sagan quote is about time. The universe is timeless and limitless however we are in a time-space reality. Time is all an illusion as we only truly have this NOW moment. Our ego will think about the past and future and we rarely become mindful and bask in the current moment.

“The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be.” – Marcel Pagnol

The ego deviates us from our true state of bliss, freedom and relaxation. It makes us worry, overthink and become ungrateful. I find it hard to accept that I have moments of great appreciation and happiness and yet find myself still having moments of frustration and lack at times therefore we must remember,

“Life isn’t as serious as the mind makes it out to be.” – Ekhart Tolle

Being unemployed for the past few months has resulted in negative thoughts creeping in such as “how will I explain employment gaps?”, “I’ve wasted time”, “There’ll be new graduates graduating this year, what have I done with myself?” I have forgotten my accomplishments and that life is fun and a journey. I have so much going for me and an amazing future ahead of me! Everyone has their own individual path and we are all destined for different things. Such feelings and thoughts of negativity can arise through comparison of yourself with others. It’s also a result of worrying what others think about you. This is your life, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone and whoever is worth your time will recognise you. I am so blessed to have family and friends who always support me and love me, I must return that love to myself. I have let time discourage me.

We don’t have to have a very busy and active life to be grateful for times of peace and relaxation. Boredom can get the better of us, I know it gets the better of me and so it results in me feeling demotivated and useless. We must know that life happens the way it’s meant to and this time out is just a part of the process. The best thing to do is not label it as anything such as “unemployed” or “trying to figure out my life.” Life happens and is always moving, stay positive and do not let circumstances outside of you rob you of your peace. Nothing lasts forever and everything is temporary including outside situations and inner emotions. This too shall pass.

It’s normal to have good days and bad days, that’s life. The best thing to do is to just work on feeling better. Relax in the thought and knowledge that everything works our perfectly for us, life happens FOR us, we are life! We are always connected to source and we feel bad when we disconnect ourselves through letting our ego get the better of us. We are humans and we will experience a variety in emotions and feelings, we are learning and expanding. We need to let ourselves of the hook. To finish off, I will quote something that I said to a close friend of mine last night,

“We are human and we’re not perfect but we’re also more powerful than we think.”

Never dis-empower or belittle yourself with feelings of “failure.” Know you are important and expect success.

“You can’t get it wrong and you never get it done” – Abraham Hicks

Staying hopeful through confusion and demotivation

So I haven’t written in a while, I think I’ve just been lazy and a little scared. The past few months have been a little up and down and dry for me. I want a job but I lack motivation to look. I am a little out of focus because on one hand I want a job to get money but then I also want to kick start a career. I lack focus on where I exactly want to go and so this can be stressful at times and leaves me feeling uninspired. Such decisions pan out as life goes on and we sometimes pressure ourselves too much into believing we must have all of the answers.

Sometimes we forget to just enjoy life and trust that things work out as they should. We all have our own individual life path. It’s very easy to take life too seriously when really that’s just our minds talking nonsense. Abraham Hicks says that when pure inspiration hits, the universe will guide you to where you must be and what actions you must take and when you know this…”wild horses cannot keep you from it.”

Being unemployed has allowed me to explore what I wish to pursue creatively and to stay open to random opportunities. I guess it’s reinforced that my main priority is to pursue work I enjoy and that is fulfilling; work that will allow me to progress and learn so that I can build a career rather than just working to make money. Sometimes that can be hard to accept and I just feel lazy and bored when I have nothing to do. I feel as though I am watching the days pass me by and time is slipping away and being wasted. However that is a perception and interpretation from the ego. We have been conditioned to believe that we must always be active in order to prove ourselves. My friends that are working and earning money wish that they were in my shoes! We seem to criticise and point out the flaws of where we find ourselves in life rather than relax and know that everything is as it should be.

I read a quote today from my Angel Messages book by Juan Nakamori,

“No matter how difficult your circumstances, never give up hope. Trust in the wisdom of the Creator as, out of the blue, events may turn in your favour.”

This quote has made me feel so at ease since I always tell myself and others whenever feeling stagnant; you don’t know what’s around the corner. It just takes a single event or meeting for everything to change and for great things happen. It’s exciting and encouraging to know that life can surprise us and show us everything we’ve wanted unfold before our eyes.

I also had a dream a few weeks back in which I was walking along a road and just enjoying my journey even though there wasn’t much to see (which is how we should live life). I then approached a crossroads and I saw a sign pointing specifically towards a road with my full name on it boldly and clearly. I interpret this dream as a reflection of my current situation of being unemployed and confused. It is a reminder that I am always on a journey and I must enjoy it and when the time comes to choose a path, I will know which one to take as it will boldly indicate what direction is the right route for me.

Life always works out for us and I find that when we attain what we’ve wished for, we forget never having it in the first place. We then look back with understanding as to why things panned out the way they did. I hope I can read this back next month and feel as if I’ve progressed immensely :). There is always opportunity for change and to take steps in achieving what you want regardless of where you currently find yourself.

Focus only on what you want

“If you could just give you’re undivided attention to where you want to go and never mind where you’ve been and stop trying to explain to everyone why you’re standing where you’re standing, you would clean your vibration up so fast you would attune to the vibration of your desire so quickly and people watching you would be amazed. They would say, “Who anointed you king of the world? How is it that you just wave your hand and whatever you want happens? How is it that doors open for you, that seas part for you, that you barely get an idea about something and the Universe finds a way to help you manifest it? How is it that you were born with this golden spoon in your mouth? How is it that you are the most blessed person that we know?” the throngs will say to you. And you will say, “All I do is think about what I want and let that dominate my vibration. And I don’t pay too much attention to where I’ve been because it seems irrelevant. And I pay attention to the way I feel and when I don’t feel good I try to feel better by thinking thoughts that feel better. And I’ve just trained myself to follow the good feeling.”

Abraham Hicks – 8th May 2004

“You are the “you” niverse. The “you” niverse is only made up of “you”, and that’s all you’ll ever find in your particular “you” niverse…is you, your expression of the Infinite.”

“You are the “you” niverse. The “you” niverse is only made up of “you”, and that’s all you’ll ever find in your particular “you” niverse…is you, your expression of the Infinite.”

Bashar

The beauty of hindsight regarding a breakup

In a few days it’s going to be a year since my ex and I split up. This year of being single has been amazing. However, the first few months were agonizing and hard as I had to rebuild my self love from the pain of the breakup and emotional turmoil. I had become insecure and found it very easy to fall into the trap of self pity and blame. Such feelings are common given the circumstances and I never wanted to fall in love again. I also felt as if I had forgotten how to be single and being alone with my thoughts was unpleasant. I now look back and am grateful for the experience. My ex was my first proper boyfriend, my first love and he set the standard for every guy thereafter. The men I attract now are so much better than the boys I’d attract before that relationship. I am also a lot more aware of my self worth and do not feel I need attention or a male figure in my life constantly in order to feel good about myself.

I’ve never been one to rely on a male companion to feel fulfilled or happy however we all enjoy receiving attention and it’s fun having that someone to flirt and talk to. Being in love and the feeling of fresh romance is exhilarating and I can look back at the moments I first fell in love and feel the raw, intense joy it brings. That is how I know I have fully overcome the pain from that breakup and feel no bitterness towards my ex. I have reached a place of understanding and compassion. I see and understand that every relationship and romantic encounter is a lesson to us; they allow us to collect data on what we really want and need in a man. These “mistakes” allow progression and so when approached from a detached perspective, the breakups do not being pain, they bring us an opportunity to upgrade from the relationship we thought was best for us. I needed to make that mistake of falling in love and being attached in order to be able to look at myself later and realise where I had gone wrong in order to prevent that happening again. Being in love for the first time can be very confusing and overwhelming  The next relationships will only be better as I now know what it feels like to fall in love and how I should keep myself aware of the bigger picture in life at all times. We can easily lose sight and get caught up in the infatuation and feelings of romance. We can also easily get caught up in the feelings of bitterness, pain and over-thinking of what went “wrong” when the relationship ends.

Every emotion and experience serves us and it takes time for us to get over all the negative, confused emotions and thoughts to embrace that concept. I feel I am at my peak with my sense of self worth and what I deserve in a man and that will only expand in the future. Life just gets better and better as time goes on….if you let it.

When I now think of what I want in my man/husband, there is more on the list than there was 18 months ago. My ex was everything I wanted back then, the guys after him have been an upgrade since and now I am still adding to that list (I’d listen to Beyoncé – Upgrade U after the breakup quite frequently 😉 hehe). I cannot wait to meet this amazing companion. However I am happy being single at the moment and I’m so in love with myself and life that I feel fulfilled. I feel satisfied yet excited and open to receiving more of life’s great gifts which are beyond our imagination. It’s all about finding that balance between feeling fulfilled and happy with life yet also aware and open to new experiences. Being so satisfied with life that you feel bored is stagnation, keep the imagination flowing.

So I’d like to say thank you to the universe for that heartbreak I experienced last year and the amazing year I’ve had being single. I feel strong, I feel love, I feel joy, I feel invincible, I feel aware and I feel expansive. As Anthony Robbins says, “Raise your standards.” Life presents you with higher standards through mistakes and so you can only receive better if you embrace every lesson life brings.

Happy New Year

It’s the last day of 2012 and when I look back at this year and how much has happened; I feel immense liberation. This time last year I was in a relationship however I could tell it was coming to an end. I was in my final year of university and truthfully, I felt dissatisfied with life. I was depressed and would have to convince myself that I was happy however my mind and heart were contradicting eachother. I was definitely out of alignment.

A lot of soul searching has occurred this year. The tipping point for me where the quality of my life really improved was in July this year. I finally felt that all of the pain and bitterness towards the split from my ex was gone. I loved myself and began genuinely enjoying life. Thereafter things just got better and better. I became a redhead in May which was actually accidental but nothing is ever really an accident is it ;). My red hair has become my identity and I love it! Everyone compliments it and tells me it’s my colour and I really can’t imagine myself going back to black or brown any time soon.

I graduated on 21st July with my university degree in Media which I had a great time studying. It was the end of an amazing chapter in my life and I was ready to move onto the next one. I was enjoying being back at home and around my family more, I was getting to spend time with my friends from back home and loved meeting up with university friends. I started listening to the teachings of Abraham Hicks frequently and began to truly embrace and bask in every moment of happiness and so felt continuous appreciation for life. Great people and experiences were coming to me all the time and since the bigger picture of life has remained my focal point, I feel detachment. I see that life is just one big lesson whereby we continue to grow and evolve, if we let ourselves. Holding onto pain is just a huge and unnecessary delay in attaining happiness as well as the biggest thief of our true power. Everything we do and think is a habit and I’ve made happiness mine. Negative feelings and thoughts have been quieted,

“Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death”

I can honestly say I feel in top of the world and so strong right now. The final six months of this year, especially this past month have been so fun and fulfilling. I am so in love with life and myself. If you love life, it will love you back. I have learned so much about how important it is to focus on your desires and to enjoy life. I have a continuous feeling of contentment with life as well as excitement 😀 .

“Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” – Lao Tzu

I am very excited to see what 2013 will bring me as I’m filled with tremendous hope and know that the universe gives me everything I want in abundance.

“Feelings of love, joy, passion, exhilaration, fun, interest….. are indications of your vibrational match to Well-being.” – Abraham-Hicks

“A man is born alone and dies alone” – Chanakya

Today I was feeling quite down and reached out to one of my best friends telling her how sad and lonely I felt. She reminded me that we all have our days when we don’t feel strong. It seems that we beat ourselves up for feeling bad when we catch ourselves having negative thoughts, however such moments are inevitable and you’ve just got to persevere. I was feeling anger towards the man I talked about in Heartbreak and Self Worth – Part 2 as yesterday everything seemed to hit me like a ton of bricks. My beautiful older sister was there to help me out and said she realised I wasn’t actually upset enough when I had initially told her what had happened with him. She held me whilst I cried and talked it out with me.

Sometimes you just need to let others look after you and help you. That’s why we have friends and family. They are the reminders and reflections of who we really are when we lose ourselves through clouded thoughts due to circumstances and overwhelming, incomprehensible emotions. Another thing that my friend reminded me of this morning which put everything into perspective for me again was that ultimately we are our own person.

“A man is born alone and dies alone” – Chanakya

I ask myself this whenever I feel down and depressed; “When I die and look back on my life, do I want to see that I spent most of my time a victim to other people and circumstances outside of myself or do I want to see that I seized as much happiness as I could and lived in gratitude most of the time?”

Bad days are inevitable and there’s going to be times where we’re just get fed up of everything and lose morale. I got so angry last night that I shouted, “I aligned with what I wanted, I got it and now its been thrown back in my face. What are you meant to do when that happens?!” Sometimes you just have to let it all out and let the answers unfold. I guess concealing our feelings is another form of attempting to have control over life when we’ve just got to accept that we are humans and we are not perfect. Here’s a tweet I saw earlier which I’ll leave you with;

@TheGodLight: What you fight against controls you, to overcome a problem you must not fight, but lead the problem to its resolution