Taking responsibility of your emotions is powerful

It demonstrates unconditional self love and forgiveness. You are allowed to feel sad, unhappy and tired. Instead of worrying about not looking or being attractive to others because of those negative emotions, choose to give yourself attention and listen to them. Tend to them. This act of taking responsibility demonstrates power as you take charge of yourself and give yourself room to be human. Nothing lasts forever and our emotions are seasonal too. Moments of happiness and sadness are natural and essential, we really cannot appreciate one without the other.

“You don’t ever have to feel guilty about sharing your feelings. It isn’t desperate or pathetic or weak. It’s self-care and there is nothing shameful about taking care of yourself by unloading some of the pain you carry. Your feelings are important and they matter — you matter — and if you’re hurting, you’re allowed to reach out. You’re allowed to be honest and use your voice. You’re allowed to take up space and talk about what you’re feeling. You deserve to make self-care a priority. Always.”
– Daniell Koepke

We have been taught to demonstrate a cold exterior and display as little emotion as possible since showing vulnerability means we are weak. That is not true, the longer we hold feelings in and the harder we try to conceal them, they gain more power and momentum. The effort put into resisting them enlarges them. Denial is as bad as self negligence and an act of weakness since the issue is avoided rather than faced and dealt with. If we chose to accept ourselves and weren’t always trying so hard to be strong, the inner turmoil of concealing everything would eventually dissipate better. Ignorance is bliss if you’re changing your point of focus and actually feel better doing so. If the change in focus is to escape, the problem will still creep in as fear remains a part of the motive. Often, we need to admit the problem to ourselves and trust that we can open up to those closest to us. There is no shame in having tender moments, if someone cannot respect you opening up, that is their problem. Vulnerability is not a weakness if you own it. Opening up does not always mean you’ll get hurt if you are doing so from a place of compassion and hope rather than seeking acceptance.

Learning to balance the logic of the mind and the love of the heart is important. All is well accepting and expressing emotion but one mustn’t stay trapped in reliving the same story again and again. Self pitying can become a habit and an easy one to get into. Feel and experience the emotions so that you allow yourself to move past them.

“The highest form of human intelligence is to observe yourself without judgment.” – J. Krishnamurti
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“We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever.” – Carl Sagan

I just came across this quote and it really sparked up something inside of me,

“We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever.” – Carl Sagan

My interpretation of this quote resonates with something I have witnessed happen with my feelings and emotions all of the time. I interpret this quote as saying that when we have those moments of great happiness, immense feelings of love and joy; we feel so elated and on top the world and in result feel indestructible. We assume those positive feelings and highs will never end once we have attained it. However, they do.

The fact that we come down from that place of bliss is natural. However I have now come to understand that that feeling of bliss, is temporary pleasure. It is a feeling mistaken for what we’re really meant to attain which is inner peace,

“Pain is inevitable, Suffering is optional” – Buddhist Proverb

It’s very easy to get into a trap of justifying and putting a label on where you are in life. This could be due to maybe feeling stagnant and without realising, looking outside of yourself to find a reason to feel happy, successful and loved. Another thing that gets brought into this mixture is beating yourself up about feeling bad. You know how to be happy and positive yet here you are feeling low. It’s as if you’ve let yourself down as you are not appreciating everything you have or you’ve somehow not used your abilities to their best potential. Those thoughts only make the situation worse, they are not beneficial and are useless. We have the power to change things and the first step is to focus solely on what you wish to see, feel and accomplish rather than looking back or at your current situation and not feeling good about it.

Online, individuals have suggested that the meaning of the Carl Sagan quote is about time. The universe is timeless and limitless however we are in a time-space reality. Time is all an illusion as we only truly have this NOW moment. Our ego will think about the past and future and we rarely become mindful and bask in the current moment.

“The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be.” – Marcel Pagnol

The ego deviates us from our true state of bliss, freedom and relaxation. It makes us worry, overthink and become ungrateful. I find it hard to accept that I have moments of great appreciation and happiness and yet find myself still having moments of frustration and lack at times therefore we must remember,

“Life isn’t as serious as the mind makes it out to be.” – Ekhart Tolle

Being unemployed for the past few months has resulted in negative thoughts creeping in such as “how will I explain employment gaps?”, “I’ve wasted time”, “There’ll be new graduates graduating this year, what have I done with myself?” I have forgotten my accomplishments and that life is fun and a journey. I have so much going for me and an amazing future ahead of me! Everyone has their own individual path and we are all destined for different things. Such feelings and thoughts of negativity can arise through comparison of yourself with others. It’s also a result of worrying what others think about you. This is your life, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone and whoever is worth your time will recognise you. I am so blessed to have family and friends who always support me and love me, I must return that love to myself. I have let time discourage me.

We don’t have to have a very busy and active life to be grateful for times of peace and relaxation. Boredom can get the better of us, I know it gets the better of me and so it results in me feeling demotivated and useless. We must know that life happens the way it’s meant to and this time out is just a part of the process. The best thing to do is not label it as anything such as “unemployed” or “trying to figure out my life.” Life happens and is always moving, stay positive and do not let circumstances outside of you rob you of your peace. Nothing lasts forever and everything is temporary including outside situations and inner emotions. This too shall pass.

It’s normal to have good days and bad days, that’s life. The best thing to do is to just work on feeling better. Relax in the thought and knowledge that everything works our perfectly for us, life happens FOR us, we are life! We are always connected to source and we feel bad when we disconnect ourselves through letting our ego get the better of us. We are humans and we will experience a variety in emotions and feelings, we are learning and expanding. We need to let ourselves of the hook. To finish off, I will quote something that I said to a close friend of mine last night,

“We are human and we’re not perfect but we’re also more powerful than we think.”

Never dis-empower or belittle yourself with feelings of “failure.” Know you are important and expect success.

“You can’t get it wrong and you never get it done” – Abraham Hicks