“A man is born alone and dies alone” – Chanakya

Today I was feeling quite down and reached out to one of my best friends telling her how sad and lonely I felt. She reminded me that we all have our days when we don’t feel strong. It seems that we beat ourselves up for feeling bad when we catch ourselves having negative thoughts, however such moments are inevitable and you’ve just got to persevere. I was feeling anger towards the man I talked about in Heartbreak and Self Worth – Part 2 as yesterday everything seemed to hit me like a ton of bricks. My beautiful older sister was there to help me out and said she realised I wasn’t actually upset enough when I had initially told her what had happened with him. She held me whilst I cried and talked it out with me.

Sometimes you just need to let others look after you and help you. That’s why we have friends and family. They are the reminders and reflections of who we really are when we lose ourselves through clouded thoughts due to circumstances and overwhelming, incomprehensible emotions. Another thing that my friend reminded me of this morning which put everything into perspective for me again was that ultimately we are our own person.

“A man is born alone and dies alone” – Chanakya

I ask myself this whenever I feel down and depressed; “When I die and look back on my life, do I want to see that I spent most of my time a victim to other people and circumstances outside of myself or do I want to see that I seized as much happiness as I could and lived in gratitude most of the time?”

Bad days are inevitable and there’s going to be times where we’re just get fed up of everything and lose morale. I got so angry last night that I shouted, “I aligned with what I wanted, I got it and now its been thrown back in my face. What are you meant to do when that happens?!” Sometimes you just have to let it all out and let the answers unfold. I guess concealing our feelings is another form of attempting to have control over life when we’ve just got to accept that we are humans and we are not perfect. Here’s a tweet I saw earlier which I’ll leave you with;

@TheGodLight: What you fight against controls you, to overcome a problem you must not fight, but lead the problem to its resolution

Attachments are a hindrance

I have a book called Angel Messages  by Juan Nakamori which I have had for years and love to look into for little messages of guidance and positivity. My cousin gave it to me at a time where I was very depressed and whenever I’ve found myself feeling lost or upset, I will randomly open a page or think of a number and take in the message I see. Today the message I was given read:

“As you free yourself from attachment, you will gain spontaneity. As you remove restrictions, you will gain freedom.” – Page 34

This message resonates with me very well. I believe that attachments to people and things hold you back and as you become so conformable with what you have, you lose the spontaneity to do exciting things and progress in life.

I believe that the perfect mate is someone who you can be spontaneous with and someone that you are so close to where you feel like yourself at all times. You can do whatever you want in life and achieve your ambitions without the fear of that person leaving you or hindering you in any way. Many relationships are restrictive without us realising. Sometimes we resist our true selves out of fear, fear that our actions will upset others. However we need to remember that our lives belong to ourself. The people we cherish will stick with us though whatever we wish to pursue. People who try to knock you down or hold you back are insecure and not people you want to surround yourself with. I’ve found that I’m at my happiest, most free and spontaneous when single and focused on loving my friends and family. The men that have come into my life have been good to me however it’s very easy to fall into the trap of compromising yourself for them which results in holding yourself back without realising. I have seen this with my friends and other girls. I’ve always been aware that I need a man as adventurous and as free as myself who I can have an amazing relationship with. You can definitely maintain your independence and pursue the life you dream of with the right person, however my main point is that it is very easy to become attached, reliant and comfortable in a relationship which can result in loss of ambition.

Focus on yourself and trust that the right people will enter and stay in your life. Allow yourself to enjoy life and stop letting your attachments and restrictions hold you back from being your truest, most authentic self.

Just a sweet guy? Or a Man too?

It’s great having a guy that is a gentleman and treats you so well however make sure he’s also a MAN. Don’t let his sweet gestures and words take you over, he needs to be able to prove he will stick by you and not waver because of his insecurities. He may be a genuine and kind hearted guy however people can be quick to say things and blurt out whatever they’re feeling at the time such as “I love you”.  Does he just want someone to dote on and is infatuated by you or do his words have actual substance and longevity? Sometimes people are scared of their own feelings and wish to regress.

When push comes to shove and he’s no longer there for you, that’s his fault for not being able to handle having a WOMAN.

Let life happen

Stay detached and watch life unfold before you. When you are aware of your greatness and focus on all the amazing things before you, nothing can bring you down. Surrender to the universe and watch everything fall perfectly into place. Trust everything happens for our best interest because it does. Let go and let life take you to amazing places and bring amazing opportunities and people into your life. Surprises are always around the corner, never let fear or doubt stop you from being happy or hopeful.

Trying to control things bring doubt and fear and just stress you out. If anything, it blinds you from the bliss surrounding you and inhibits your abundance. Imagination is innocent and infinite, the ego is restricted and trained to think thoughts based on what man (who is not perfect) deems acceptable.

I’m letting the universe do it’s thing and man am I loving life and watching everything unfold beautifully and perfectly. I know everything works out for the best.

It’s OK to not care

When something happens that culture and society tells you you should be upset about (e.g. a breakup). Pain and sorrow are great teachers however they do not always need to be felt. Loss is perceived, we never really lose anything or anyone since we are here by ourselves and for ourselves. Being happy is our natural state and if you’re not phased by something, don’t let your mind tell you you should be. Ego is the enemy which wants to bring you down. Stay blissful and bask in the greatness of everything around you. Life is a gift to be enjoyed and everything in life is temporary.