“…each moment of life is a miracle and mystery.”

“We must not allow the clock and the calendar to blind us to the fact that each moment of life is a miracle and mystery.” – H. G. Wells

Whether life is too busy or too boring, it’s easy to get caught up in constantly trying to achieve ‘the perfect moment’ but therein lies the problem; trying to achieve something that’s already ever present.

Our minds are dominated by this time-space reality and so instead of letting each moment be, the limited ego-mind often tries to define or capture the moment. This can be seen in situations wherein we find ourselves looking back or forward and wishing we were experiencing ‘that moment’ and so completely depreciating the here and now. This can also happen whilst experiencing a moment of bliss and then letting worrisome thoughts such as, “This moment isn’t going to last forever” tarnish what was so pure and beautiful.

Clocks and calendars are great tools for organisation, staying on schedule and for planning fun events. However where’s the line between being organised and being too rigid? If we’re too busy living every day on a schedule or too bored to appreciate the moment, there’s no room in our minds to let life’s magic and mystery in.

There’s also an assumption that only happy moments are worth appreciating or chasing however without the variety of emotions and feelings we have, life would be mundane. There would be no room for growth or nothing to trigger change. Our happy days give us fond memories, and our sad days can be our biggest teachers.

Next time you find yourself stressing over time or yearning for tomorrow, remember that the Universe is limitless and there will always be magical moments to experience. Let go of trying to make ‘the perfect moment’ happen and choose to let today be.

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Image credit:
Fabrizio Verrecchia

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Perfectionism is fear of failure… 

Feeling loved and enjoying life comes from being authentic, not perfect. That’s the lesson I’ve learned this Summer.

Having had experienced another failed romance (romantic relationships just don’t seem to fully bloom into commitments for me),  I thought, “OK there’s clearly some inner work I need to do in order to dig deep and find out why I’m repeating the same experiences in my romantic relationships.”

Now I hate to admit that I have any fears or weaknesses but this time I finally faced up to the fact that my biggest fear is rejection. While I’m a confident, independent and happy woman, the belief I held was that rejection equals failure which equals ‘not good enough’.

So in order to prevent rejection, I adopted high standards which were actually perfectionism. Attaining perfection is tiresome as the idea of ‘perfect’ is an illusion, it’s subjective, and forever elusive.

I realised that I was so fixated on being “the perfect girl” in order to avoid rejection because I believed that if I ticked all of the boxes, I could never be rejected. Yet I wasn’t getting the full love and acceptance I desired in romance.

That was because I had been rejecting myself all along without even realising it. The high standards I had placed on myself were conditions; conditions I had to fulfill in order to feel good enough. This included everyday thoughts which would go unnoticed such as,  “I’ll feel 100% good about myself once I’ve had my hair done” or,  “Next week I’ll feel better once I’ve cut out the junk food.” No, the time to feel good and love yourself unconditionally is now.

I now understand how important authenticity and unconditional self approval is. Without them, we will unknowingly seek approval outside of ourselves and latch onto it once someone gives us the acceptance we’ve denied ourselves. This happens without realising as the lack of fulfilment and connectedness is masked with egoic ‘high standards’.

However when we unconditionally love and accept ourselves, other people’s opinions, whether positive or negative, become unnecessary.

Let go of the fear of failure and the need to be perfect. Instead, embrace yourself and be fearless about putting yourself and your happiness first! 

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“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.”

“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.” – Goi Nasu

Demonstrate resilience, unshakeable confidence, and always have your own back. That way no-one or nothing can deter you from happiness or pursuing your true desires. As a result your positivity remains strong and happiness is more constant as it’s your own choice rather than the effect of other people’s actions.